JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Thu, May 4, 2006 3:12:00 PM
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 5/4/06
Kerry Burgess wrote:
After my short nap yesterday late evening, when back to sleep after midnight and slept pretty soundly until after 7. Had a dream that seemed to occur just before I woke up. I was inside some kind of missile. Seems like it was an SM2-ER on the Wainwright's launcher and it was going to send me into orbit or outer space maybe. When I woke up, I heard lyrics from that song:
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 4 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Thu, May 4, 2006 3:12:00 PM
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 5/4/06
Kerry Burgess wrote:
Didn't start feeling alert until 9 am. That's when I realized I had a doctor's appt at 10am and I didn't know where it was. They sent me a map with driving directions but I had no idea which bus got there. I could have found it in 2 minutes if I had an internet connection, but I did not. I knew there was some kind of automated line for Metro but I didn't know the number or even if it would give me the info I needed. I imagined I would spend 30 minutes standing around on the phone and still not know what I needed to know. According to the map, the office was somewhere about 3.5 miles away. Two years ago, I could run that far in a half hour and I figured I could probably walk it now and get there no more than half an hour late. I was 18 minutes late. The doctor examined the hip injury from when I was in the Navy. I can't remember when the injury actually occurred. There were several things that could have caused it. I think I may have slammed into the bulwark when I was trying to avoid the anchor chain. Another time, I grabbed onto a cable that was supposed to be grounded, but I grabbed it before the guy with the grounding wand could hit it. A good lesson perhaps in overtraining. I remember my feet hurting for a while after that, but I didn't feel any kind of shock at the time. I used to wear a knife and another tool on my belt and it rested against my hip, but I can't remember if I was wearing it that day. The worst part, today, was walking around trying to get to the doctor's office and having this overwhelming feeling that everyone around me, walking, driving, they all were wondering how I was going to make it there on time. They all knew where I was supposed to be and they were all watching me like I am some kind of reality show contestant. It is overwhelming at times. I suppose it is, in some minor ways, not unlike a major leaque baseball player feels, at least some of them, when they are trying to make their first catch of a pop fly to the outfield. But this is worse. This all is just evil. The level of deception over all these years is just beyond evil. There are probably a lot of egomaniacs that fantasized about this kind of attention, but I never have. It is lunacy beyond articulation.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 4 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Thu, May 4, 2006 3:12:00 PM
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 5/4/06
And imagine your absolute worst roommate you ever had. Then imagine someone a million times worse. Then imagine having to live with 70 of them. Then imagine having to cope with all of you every where I go. Then imagine having not one single moment or shred of privacy where every minute, every second of the day, every day, every week, every month, every year, every single sound you make is heard and recorded by someone. It is worse than unbearable. I cannot begin to articulate how unbearable is this. It is a waking nightmare that is so captivating and so oppresive and I just can't wake up from it.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 4 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Tuesday, May 9, 2006 3:01:41 PM
Subject: Re: ABCs Lost
I find myself thinking about this time a long time ago. I may have been in the 4th grade at the time, I don't remember. One of us, maybe me, accidentally made up the fold-out sofa bed with the dog still in it. She stayed in there all day. I came home from school and sat down on the sofa wondering where she was. Then I started hearing her faintly crying out, but I couldn't tell where the sound was coming from. This other neighbor kid was sitting on the couch too, we had to have been crushing her. Eventually I realized she was inside the couch and let her out. She jumped out and ran to the water bowl. I can certainly understand how that dog must have felt.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 9 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Tuesday, May 9, 2006 6:01:15 PM
Subject: Right
I wonder if this is where that guy painting the picture was standing?
http://local.live.com/?v=2&sp=aN.47.619681_-122.348911
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 9 May 2006 excerpt ends]
http://maps.google.com/?ie=UTF8&t=h&layer=tc&cbll=47.619176,-122.348985&panoid=-lfueBIXwUv3LKH8_yDIyw&cbp=12,354.84278861856137,,2,3.587035306919222&ll=47.619407,-122.349037&spn=0,359.99794&z=20
156 4th Ave N, Seattle, WA, United States
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: ----- Original Message ----
From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Wednesday, May 10, 2006 2:45:01 PM
Subject: Re: Finally
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 10 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE:----- Original Message ----
From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Wednesday, May 17, 2006 6:25:22 PM
Subject: Re: Star Trek: TNG: First Contact, Nov. 22, 1996
There was that dream I had the other night, where I was inside a missile. I remembered today the similarity with this movie, in that Cochrane converted an ICBM into his warp ship. But why would someone create a connection between me and Cochrane? I didn't create warp drive in the past only to have someone block my memory of that, did I? It's funny, when I read something the other day about Data arguing with Einstein, it reminded me of something I was writing in my journal back in the early '90s. I was wondering why it was impossible to travel faster than the speed of light. A couple years ago I was writing about it again. The idea presented itself to me about why it was impossible, something about atoms not being able to work because electrons could not transfer energy faster than the speed of light. I wondered if it was possible to create some kind of process to transfer energy to those atoms, not unlike a cell's mitochondria works. Today I have been wondering if anything I remember about the past is real. Do I have a different past? Am I really who I think I am? The stuff I imagine happening to me sometimes, did that stuff really happen? I wonder if these movies and tv shows have actually been sort of inoculations, to keep me from questioning my reality. I do question reality sometimes, but it wasn't until I saw that Matrix movie a while back, did I really start to wonder about reality. But it didn't seem to matter, I wasn't overly concerned that I may be living that kind of false reality. I still don't think I am living such an extreme unreality as in the Matrix, but I wonder if there is a divergence point in my life, a shadow, a distorted period. Or have I been living a life like in the movie Soldier, or maybe like in Blade Runner, where Rachael, and I assume Harrison Ford's character, have false memories of their life. Am I Harrison Ford's character in this reality? A replicant searching for replicants?
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 17 May 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: From: Kerry Burgess
To: Kerry Burgess
Sent: Fri, May 19, 2006 10:21:01 PM
Subject: Re: Journal May 19, 2006
Kerry Burgess wrote:
My memory, which I am growing increasingly certain is false beyond a certain date
I am wondering today if I was either genetically engineered prior to birth or genetically modified after birth to allow for greater tolerance of long term travel in space.
I was thinking today about something I read recently in the novel 2001: Space Odyssey. Clarke wrote something about the progress of man from femur-wielding ape-man to man's use of guided missiles.
I wonder where the divergence point is in history? When did I become Kerry Burgess and who am I really?
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 19 May 2006 excerpt ends]
[ Bill Gates-Microsoft-Corbis-Nazi the cowardly International Terrorist Organization violently against the United States of America actively instigate insurrection and subversive activity against the United States of America with all Bill Gates-Microsoft-Corbis-Nazi staff partners contributors employees contractors lawyers managers of any capacity as severely treasonous criminal accomplices and that are active unlawful obstructions, combinations, or assemblages, or rebellion against the authority of the United States that actively make it impracticable to enforce the laws of the United States in the United States and in the Severely Treasonous and Criminally Rebellious State of Washington by the ordinary course of judicial proceedings ]
1998 film "Sphere" DVD video: [ RACKETEER INFLUENCED AND CORRUPT ORGANIZATIONS US Title 18 ]
01:22:17
Computer terminal screen: DID YOU LIKE THE GIANT SQUID?
Norman Goodman: You made that, Jerry?
Computer terminal screen: DO YOU LIKE IT? I CAN MANIFEST IT MORE FOR YOU
Norman Goodman: No, no, that - that's all right, no. Jerry. Jerry. Very important. Nothing more right now. Please. Okay?
Computer terminal screen: I DO NOT WISH TO STOP.
Norman Goodman: Jerry, you have to stop. Jerry, listen to me. This is - this is critical. Your - your manifestations injure our entities. And pretty soon there'll be no more entities left to play with and you'll be all alone again because - because you can't control yourself. Because with all your power, you don't have the power to stop, do you, Jerry?
Computer terminal screen: STOP CALLING ME JERRY.
Norman Goodman: What name do you want? Jerry? Jerry? What name do you want? Jerry?
- posted by H.V.O.M - Kerry Wayne Burgess 7:23 PM Pacific Time USA Saturday 28 April 2012
