Monday, August 14, 2006

'67 Ford

As with these painless bolts of lighning that strike me sometimes, this one clue has been there in front of my face for what literally feels to be my entire life. It is in the form of my 1967 red Ford F-100 pickup. It was Kerry Burgess's first vehicle. The model year of '67' is now obvious for its symbolism.

I think the first clue I had that this vehicle represented a fighter jet was when I suddenly remember something my mother said one day outside our house in the country. She said, "Remember what happened last time you took out the seat" or words to that effect.

I have puzzled over that recently although I am not sure how long it puzzled me. At one point, it struck me: This is representative of an ejection seat. The memory is something about me ejecting from an aircraft, probably an F-16.

In my memory as Kerry Burgess, I had this used Ford pickup that I was very proud of. I thought is was very sleek and cool, although it needed a new coat of paint. I think it is symbolized as red because that color is typically associated with high-performance. It was a pickup to represent how an F-16 can carry ordnance. The engines of an F-16 are Pratt & Whitney F100 models. This 1967 Ford was a single-exhaust engine just as the F-16 is a single engine, with a single exhaust.

This memory of my mom cautioning me about the seat actually occurred when I had my second vehicle, which was a 1967 blue Chevrolet long-bed pickup. It had a V-8 engine with dual-exhaust. I am not sure what it is also a 1967, but maybe just to get me to think more about the symbolism so I can find my way back to my life as Thomas Ray. The other attributes are consistent with the red Ford, in that I think this vehicle represents an F-14 because it is a dual exhaust and the F-14 had two engines. The color blue may be because I was with the Blue Angels. That means it could also represent an F-18. I think Thomas Ray flew with the Blue Angels during two periods. First as a Midshipman, and then for a period in later years.

So the comments from mom occurred one day when I had the '67 Chevrolet. My step-father raised hunting dogs and we regularly attended these organized sporting event called "fox hunting." It is completely unlike the English version with the only exception being that the dogs did chase a fox, but we didn't ride around on horses. I was washing my truck in preparation to go up to the nearby town for the event. I was usually a field judge during the events. This day I was about to take out the seat from the cab of the truck so I could wash out the cab. My mom then called out to remind of what happened last time I did that.

The last time I took the seat out was with my red Ford. Shortly after that, I wrecked it. I was traveling to fast taking a turn on a gravel road and I started swerving and then hit a stump with flipped the truck completely over. I remember a lot more detail to all that, but I think most of those details are there for continuity and to deflect my attention away from reality. I believe that in reality, it represents a time when Thomas Ray had to eject from a F-16. I am not sure of the circumstances that forced him to eject.