During a celebration in the town of "Springfield" that seems to occur on the same day every year, "Ned Flanders" is feeling down because he is alone. "Homer" comments in his direction that the day is made for lovers, but not for widowers.
The Simpsons (Repeat)
69 CBUT: Wednesday, June 18 5:00 PM
Sitcom, Animated
A Star Is Born Again
Flanders squires a sexy starlet (Marisa Tomei) around Springfield.
Cast: Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith, Hank Azaria, Harry Shearer Executive Producer(s): James L. Brooks, Matt Groening, David Mirkin
Original Air Date: Mar 02, 2003
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/CABF09
Hungry Hungry Homer
Original Airdate on FOX: 04-Mar-01
% Homer infiltrates Bart's classroom and sits next to Sherri.
Homer: Come on, why won't you go out with Bart?
Sherri: He's a smelly, ugly dork.
Homer: Please, "ugly" is such a smelly word. Who would you rather go out with?
Sherri: Tommy. [indicates a handsome boy bathed in an angelic glow]
Homer: Well, duh! He's breathtaking. But Bart has inner beauty, like you'd find in a rodent. [cut to Bart, gnawing rat-like on a cracker, then back to Homer]
http://www.army.mil/cmh/html/moh/vietnam-m-z.html
NORRIS, THOMAS R.
Rank and organization: Lieutenant, U.S. Navy, SEAL Advisor, Strategic Technical Directorate Assistance Team, Headquarters, U.S. Military Assistance Command. Place and date: Quang Tri Province, Republic of Vietnam, 10 to 13 April 1972. Entered service at: Silver Spring, Md. Born: 14 January 1944, Jacksonville, Fla. Citation: Lt. Norris completed an unprecedented ground rescue of 2 downed pilots deep within heavily controlled enemy territory in Quang Tri Province. Lt. Norris, on the night of 10 April, led a 5-man patrol through 2,000 meters of heavily controlled enemy territory, located 1 of the downed pilots at daybreak, and returned to the Forward Operating Base (FOB). On 11 April, after a devastating mortar and rocket attack on the small FOB, Lt. Norris led a 3-man team on 2 unsuccessful rescue attempts for the second pilot. On the afternoon of the 12th, a forward air controller located the pilot and notified Lt. Norris. Dressed in fishermen disguises and using a sampan, Lt. Norris and 1 Vietnamese traveled throughout that night and found the injured pilot at dawn. Covering the pilot with bamboo and vegetation, they began the return journey, successfully evading a North Vietnamese patrol. Approaching the FOB, they came under heavy machinegun fire. Lt. Norris called in an air strike which provided suppression fire and a smoke screen, allowing the rescue party to reach the FOB. By his outstanding display of decisive leadership, undaunted courage, and selfless dedication in the face of extreme danger, Lt. Norris enhanced the finest traditions of the U.S. Naval Service.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_R._Norris
Nickname: Tommy, Ratso
Place of birth: Jacksonville, Florida
Allegiance: United States Navy
Battles/wars: Vietnam War
Awards: Medal of Honor
Other work: FBI agent
Thomas R. Norris, USN (Retired) (born 14 January 1944) is a retired a U.S. Navy SEAL awarded the Medal of Honor for his ground rescue of two downed pilots in Quang Tri Province, Vietnam on April 10-April 13, 1972. At the time of the action, Lieutenant Norris was a SEAL Advisor with the Strategic Technical Directorate Assistance Team.
http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/index.php?pid=5662&st=&st1=
176 - Remarks on Awarding the Congressional Medal of Honor to Four Members of the Armed Forces.
March 4th, 1976
Medal of Honor recipients and their families, distinguished Members of the Congress, Secretary Rumsfeld, Secretary Middendorf, Secretary Reed, members of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, ladies and gentlemen:
We are gathered here today to honor four Americans for exceptional military gallantry in the service of our Nation. All four of these men distinguished themselves above and beyond the call of duty. I deeply regret that one of the awards, to the late Captain Lance P. Sijan, of the United States Air Force, is posthumous. The other three, Rear Admiral James P. Stockdale, United States Navy; Colonel George E. Day, United States Air Force; and Lieutenant Thomas R. Norris, United States Naval Reserve, are here with us today.
"The rat symbolizes obviousness."
The Simpsons (Repeat)
13 KCPQ: Sunday, June 1 8:00 PM
Sitcom, Animated
The Debarted
Bart suspects that one of his friends is a rat when his seemingly fool-proof pranks start to backfire; Homer grows very attached to the fancy loaner car he gets after Marge damages their vehicle in an accident.
Cast: Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith, Hank Azaria, Harry Shearer Executive Producer(s): James L. Brooks, Matt Groening, Al Jean
Original Air Date: Mar 02, 2008
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abe_Simpson
Abraham J. Simpson, perennially known as "Grandpa" Simpson, was born in the "Old Country" (he apparently does not remember which). Almost all of his biographical information is supplied by Abe himself. Many of his stories seem to be wildly inaccurate, often physically or historically impossible, and occasionally inconsistent even with each other, suggesting that Abe is senile. He once referred to Sarah Bernhardt as a former president, and claims to have personally turned cats and dogs against each other. He also said in the episode "King of the Hill" that he died on Mount Springfield. He claims to have emigrated to the United States with his family from an unspecified country. They lived in the Statue of Liberty until they filled the head with garbage and had to move out. He then moved to Albany, New York, where he was supposedly voted "most handsome boy". He claims to have enlisted in the US Army during World War I by lying about his age, as he is a toddler in one war scene.
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/AABF09
Homer to the Max
Original Airdate on FOX: 7-Feb-99
(United States) Having the same name as a bumbling TV character prompts a name change for Homer, whose impressive new moniker puts him on Springfield's "A" list. Ed Begley, Jr. has a cameo.
(Canada) Homer is the laughing stock of Springfield when a TV character bears both his name and d'oh-pey personality.
% "Admiral Baby" kicks off the night. On the deck of an enormous ship,
% two officers talk with each other.
Officer #1: We're taking the entire sixth fleet to Candy Island?
Officer #2: Those are the Admiral's orders!
[The Admiral is revealed to be a diapered baby in a crib wearing the appropriate hat and jacket. He loses balance and falls over to a laugh track and funny noises, while the Simpsons look on uninterestedly.]
Marge: It's hard to believe someone that young could have risen to the rank of Admiral.
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1659730,00.html
10 Questions for Buzz Aldrin
Thursday, Sep. 06, 2007
Given what happened with Lisa Nowak, should astronauts be held to a higher standard?
Astronauts are not superhuman. They lead ordinary lives and have varied personalities. I think Nowak should be admired for traveling across the country at night and not getting out of her car to put in gas or go to the restroom. It is not excusable, but it is understandable for an achiever to fall into a trap.
From 5/10/1963 ( Lisa Marie Nowak ) to 5/21/1969 ( I am Princeton University medical doctor degree graduate ) is: 2203 days
From 3/3/1959 ( my birth date US ) to 3/14/1965 ( I am active duty Central Intelligence Agency officer ) is: 2203 days
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisa_Nowak
Missions STS-121
Lisa Marie Nowak (née Caputo) (born May 10, 1963) is a United States naval officer and a former NASA astronaut. Born in Washington, DC, she was selected by NASA in 1996 and qualified as a mission specialist in robotics. Nowak flew aboard Space Shuttle Discovery during mission STS-121 in July 2006. She was responsible for operating the robotic arms of the shuttle and the International Space Station
From 7/29/1958 ( NASA formed ) to 3/29/1965 ( William Anthony Oefelein ) is: 2435 days
From 3/4/1959 ( my birth date UK ) to 11/2/1965 ( my birth date official United States federal undercover identity ) is: 2435 days
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Oefelein
Missions STS-116
William Anthony "Bill" Oefelein (born March 29, 1965) is an American Naval officer and former NASA astronaut. He flew as pilot of the STS-116 space shuttle mission.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shelton%2C_Washington
Shelton, Washington
Shelton is a city in Mason County, Washington, United States. Shelton is the western most city on the Puget Sound.
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1659730,00.html
10 Questions for Buzz Aldrin
Thursday, Sep. 06, 2007
Are you upset about the ad hoc way NASA settled who would be first to step on the moon?
I felt we needed a decision to proceed with training, so I sort of forced the issue. What NASA did was absolutely correct. It would have been unacceptable for the commander to sit up in the lunar module while his co-pilot made the first historic step on the moon.
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1659730,00.html
10 Questions for Buzz Aldrin
Thursday, Sep. 06, 2007
What contributed to the depression and alcoholism you experienced after Apollo 11?
Returning to Earth was challenging for me. I was a celebrity on a pedestal, and I had to live up to that. Like actors and writers who are on and off again in terms of employment, I had a very unstructured life. So the alcoholism and depression, which I inherited, were ripe to flourish.
Frank Borman was talking in the recent installment of "When We Left Earth: The NASA Missions" about how cold it was sitting there in the Apollo 8 spacecraft Command Module waiting for the launch for the Moon in December 1968.
Buzz Aldrin talks in the episode about how the geology training in preparation for Apollo 11 seemed to him "make believe" and a "charade" for the cameras.
Later still, the part about Apollo 13 describes that the spacecraft temperature on the Apollo 13 was down to about 34 degrees F.
When We Left Earth: The NASA Missions (New)
16 DSCP: Sunday, June 15 9:00 PM
Science, History
The Explorers
NASA rebounds from the Apollo 1 tragedy with missions into deep space and the moon.
Original Air Date: Jun 15, 2008
When We Left Earth: The NASA Missions (New)
16 DSCP: Sunday, June 15 11:00 PM
Science, History
Landing the Eagle
NASA lands Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin on the moon.
Original Air Date: Jun 15, 2008
From 10/11/1968 ( I was Apollo 7 spacecraft astronaut ) to 5/31/2008 ( space shuttle Discovery STS-124 launches into Earth orbit ) is: 14477 days
'14 April 1977' ( I returned to Earth after successfully diverting the comet in the outer solar system )
From 12/7/1998 ( my official United States federal special undercover operation begins the current phase ) to 5/31/2008 ( space shuttle Discovery STS-124 launches into Earth orbit ) is 3 days, 3 weeks, 5 months, 9 years
'33-59' ( my birth date US )
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/STS-124
Mission name STS-124
Space Shuttle Discovery
Launch date May 31, 2008 5:02:12 p.m. EDT
Landing June 14, 2008 11:16:19 a.m. EDT
Mission duration 13 days, 18 hrs, 13 minutes 7 seconds
Number of orbits 217
STS-124 was a Space Shuttle mission, flown by Space Shuttle Discovery to the International Space Station.
From 8/24/1960 ( Steven Wayne Lindsey ) to 1/21/1976 ( my first landing on planet Mars and my documented and lawful exclusive claim to the territory of planet Mars ) is: 5628 days
5628 = 2814 + 2814
From 3/3/1959 ( my birth date US ) to 11/15/1966 ( Gemini 12 spacecraft splashdown and I was Gemini 12 spacecraft astronaut ) is: 2814 days
From 8/24/1960 ( Steven Wayne Lindsey ) to 10/11/1968 ( I was Apollo 7 spacecraft astronaut ) is: 2970 days
From 10/11/1968 ( I was Apollo 7 spacecraft astronaut ) to 11/28/1976 ( I launched from Jupiter moon Callisto for Earth ) is: 2970 days
From 8/24/1960 ( Steven Wayne Lindsey ) to 5/21/1969 ( I am Princeton University medical doctor degree graduate ) is: 3192 days
3192 = 1596 + 1596
From 3/3/1959 ( my birth date US ) to 7/16/1963 ( my wife ) is: 1596 days
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steven_W._Lindsey
Missions STS-87, STS-95, STS-104, STS-121
Steven Wayne Lindsey (born August 24, 1960) is an American Air Force officer and a NASA astronaut. Lindsey currently serves as Chief of the NASA Astronaut Office.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chief_of_the_Astronaut_Office
The Chief of the Astronaut Office is the most senior astronaut position at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA). The Chief Astronaut serves as head of the NASA Astronaut Corps and is the principal advisor to the NASA Administrator on astronaut training and operations.
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/1F13.html
Deep Space Homer
Original airdate in N.A.: 24-Feb-94
Homer's next phone call from Moe's is to the President of the United States.
Homer: Hello, is this President Clinton? Good! I figured if anyone knew where to get some Tang, it'd be you. ...Shut up!
Assistant: Excuse me --
Homer: Aah!
Assistant: Are you the person that called NASA yesterday?
Homer: No, it wasn't me, I swear! It was...him! [points to Barney]
Scientist: Sir, how would you like to get higher than you've ever been in your life?
Barney: Be an astronaut? Sure!
Scientist: Well, welcome aboard. I think you'll find this will win you the respect of your family and friends.
Homer: [gasps] Respect? Nooo! It was me. _I_ made the crank call. I do it all the time! Check with the FBI: I have a file. I have a file!
Scientist: Ehh, better take both of them.
[The assistant clubs Barney and Homer, knocking them out]
I don't really think that was necessary; they _wanted_ to be astronauts.
Assistant: I know.
From 7/21/1969 ( I was Apollo 11 Eagle astronaut walking on Earth's moon ) to 4/14/1996 ( premiere TV episode "The Simpsons, 22 Short Films About Springfield" ) is: 9764 days
9764 = 4882 + 4882
From 7/16/1963 ( my wife ) to 11/26/1976 ( my first landing Jupiter moon Callisto ) is: 4882 days
http://www.snpp.com/episodes/3F18.html
[3F18] 22 Short Films About Springfield
Original Airdate in N.A.: 14-Apr-96
Moe: Say, Barn, uh, remember when I said I'd have to send away to NASA to calculate your bar tab?
Barney: Oh ho, oh yeah, you had a good laugh, Moe.
Moe: The results came back today.
Moe: [reading a printout] You owe me seventy billion dollars.
Barney: Huh?
Moe: No, wait, wait, wait, that's for the Voyager spacecraft.
Barney's tab is fourteen billion dollars.
From 4/20/1972 ( I was Apollo 16 Orion astronaut landing on the Earth's moon ) to 12/20/2006 ( The Stolen Valor Act of 2005 ) is: 12662 days
12662 = 6331 + 6331
From 3/3/1959 ( my birth date US ) to 7/2/1976 ( I intercepted the comet in the outer solar system and set to work at diverting it ) is: 6331 days
From 4/21/1972 ( I was Apollo 16 Orion astronaut walking on the Earth's moon ) to 12/20/2006 ( The Stolen Valor Act of 2005 ) is: 12661 days
From 7/16/1963 ( my wife ) to 3/15/1998 ( as a U.S. Navy officer, I was secretly deployed on an official United States federal assignment ) is: 12661 days
From 5/22/1969 ( I was Apollo 10 spacecraft astronaut in orbit of Earth's moon ) to 12/20/2006 ( The Stolen Valor Act of 2005 ) is: 13726 days
13726 = 6863 + 6863
From 7/16/1963 ( my wife ) to 4/30/1982 ( my graduation and commissioning U.S. Naval Academy Class of 1982 ) is: 6863 days
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stolen_Valor_Act_of_2005
The Stolen Valor Act of 2005 (the Act), signed into law by [ U.S. national traitor George W. Bush ] on December 20, 2006, is a U.S. law that broadens the provisions of previous U.S. law addressing the unauthorized wearing, manufacture or selling of military decorations and medals. It is a federal offense which carries a punishment of prison time and/or a fine; the scope previously covered only the Medal of Honor.
The Act was first introduced into the United States Congress's House of Representatives on July 19, 2005 by Representative John Salazar, a Democrat from Colorado, as H.R. 3352. It was introduced into the Senate by Senator Kent Conrad, a Democrat from North Dakota, on November 10, 2005 as S. 1998. The Senate version was passed unanimously on September 7, 2006. The Senate version then went to the same House Judiciary Committee that held the House version. The Act briefly stalled, but the House subsequently passed the Senate version, S. 1998, on December 6, 2006.
The purpose of the Act is to strengthen the provisions of 18 U.S.C. § 704 by broadening its scope and strengthening penalties. Specific new provisions in the Act include: granting more authority to Federal law enforcement officers, extending scope beyond the Medal of Honor, broadening the law to cover false claims whereas previously an overt act had to be committed, covering mailing and shipping of medals, and protecting the reputation and meaning of military heroism medals.
The need for the Act came about because of large numbers of fake military heroes in the United States. For example, as of June 2, 2006 there were only 120 living Medal of Honor recipients, but there were far more known imposters. There are also large numbers of fake Navy SEALS and Army Special Forces, among others.
