Friday, May 18, 2007

Belle

JOURNAL ARCHIVE: July 29, 2006
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I just saw this. For some reason I can't explain, I feel that it is relevant to me.

http://www.reagan.utexas.edu/archives/speeches/1981/82081b.htm

Proclamation 4853 -- Commodore John Barry Day

August 20, 1981

By the President of the United States

of America

A Proclamation

Commodore John Barry, hero of the American Revolution and holder of the first commission in the United States Navy under the Constitution, was born in 1745, in County Wexford, Ireland. Commodore Barry was commissioned to command the brig Lexington, one of the first ships bought and equipped for the Revolution, and became a national hero with the engagement and capture of the British warship Edward on April 7, 1776. He distinguished himself throughout the Revolution and again shortly thereafter in the Quasi-War with France as a fighter and seaman.

In 1797, with the advice and consent of the Senate, President Washington appointed Commodore Barry Captain in the Navy of the United States and Commander of the Frigate United States. In so doing, the President said that he placed ``special Trust and Confidence in (Commodore Barry's) Patriotism, Valour, Fidelity, and Abilities''.


That John Barry proclamation was on August 20, 1981. The day before, August 19th, was when the U.S. Navy shot down those two Libyan Sukhoi's that were interfering with Freedom of Navigation exercises. I wonder if I was there. I want to say that Reagan was just a fan of the U.S. Navy's professionalism, but then I wonder more about that clue with me living on Wexford in Taylors in 1991.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulf_of_Sidra_incident_(1981)

The first Gulf of Sidra incident, August 19, 1981, was an incident in which two Libyan Sukhoi Su-22 Fitter fighter jets engaged two US F-14 Tomcats off of the Libyan coast.


When I think about the A-7, I always remember telling my mother one time when I was a kid that the A-7 could carry its weight in bombs. There is also this reference to the A-6 crew where one was a POW for a year. It says the pilot was killed, but is that the truth?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Combat_history_of_the_F-14
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Operations In Grenada and Lebanon
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These incidents resulted in US air strikes against Syrian positions near Hammana. During the attacks one A-7 Corsair and one A-6 Intruder were shot down. The A-6 pilot was killed and his Bombardier/Navigator taken prisoner and released a year later. The A-7 pilot ejected and was recovered by friendly forces.

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I'm wondering if this happened because I was there and the Libyans knew I was there. If that is true, they were trying to shoot me down because Reagan was leaving office later that month, sort of a going away present from Qhaddafi. I just wish I could remember so I would know what this means.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulf_of_Sidra_incident_%281989%29

The second Gulf of Sidra incident, January 4, 1989, occurred when two US F-14 Tomcats shot down two Libyan MiG-23 Flogger Es that appeared to be attempting to engage them, as had happened previously in the first Gulf of Sidra incident (1981).


I find this speech to be very curious, having occurred two days after the second Gulf of Sidra incident.

http://www.reagan.utexas.edu/archives/speeches/1989/010689a.htm
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Fair compensation for those who bear the responsibility for effective functioning of our government is critical at this juncture of history. The American people expect excellence at the top levels of government, and they deserve to get it. But our Founding Fathers also envisioned a citizen government whose members are drawn from all parts of our society.

We must not allow Federal service to become the province only of the wealthy.
...
During my Presidency, I have been impressed with the ability and dedication of the senior Federal officials who serve our country. It is in the Nation's best interest to attract and keep highly qualified individuals for senior government positions. I ask you to support the bipartisan Commission's unanimous pay recommendations to ensure that the American people continue to benefit from the government service of highly talented Americans.


Interesting. I wonder why that Jolly Rogers aircraft had the "AJ" on its tailfin.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VF-213

Strike Fighter Squadron 213 (VFA-213) is a U.S. Navy fighter squadron based at NAS Oceana. Their tail code is AJ, their radio callsign is Lion

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Also interesting. F-14 number 204 from the Black Lions was the last recovery of an F-14 Tomcat from a combat mission.

http://www.navy.mil/management/photodb/photos/060207-N-9805F-004.jpg


060207-N-9805F-004 Persian Gulf (Feb. 7, 2006) - An F-14D Tomcat from the "Black Lions" of Fighter Squadron Two One Three (VF-213) catches the arresting wire on the flight deck aboard the Nimitz-class aircraft carrier USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN 71). Roosevelt and embarked Carrier Air Wing Eight (CVW-8) are currently underway on a regularly scheduled deployment conducting maritime security operations.

http://www.news.navy.mil/search/display.asp?story_id=22325

TR Traps Last Tomcat from Combat Mission

Release Date: 2/15/2006

ABOARD USS THEODORE ROOSEVELT (NNS) -- A chapter in naval aviation history drew to a close Feb. 8 aboard USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN 71) with the last recovery of an F-14 Tomcat from a combat mission.

Piloted by Capt. William G. Sizemore II, commander, Carrier Air Wing (CVW) 8, Fighter Squadron (VF) 213’s aircraft 204 was trapped at 12:35 a.m. and marked one of the final stages of the Navy’s transition from the F-14 to F/A-18 E/F Super Hornet.

“It’s the end of an era and it just kind of worked out that I was the last trap,” said Sizemore. “This is one of the best airplanes ever built, and it’s sad to see it go away. It’s just a beautiful airplane. It’s powerful, it has presence, and it just looks like the ultimate fighter.”

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in Generations, there was a big hole in the Enterprise-B there next to the deflector. The heat tiles on the Columbia, thinking of STS-1, are a good analogy to the Star Trek Deflector Array. AND, after I just wrote those last words, I thought again about something I have been wanting to write about. I'll write more about it later, but I almost lost the fiberglass cover to the WDS on the Wainwright when the wind caught it. I was thinking that had some relevance to losing an aircraft canopy and it slightly resembled in shape a canopy. But the WDS was some kind of predecessor to AEGIS in that it had elements inside of it that sort of resemble the heat tiles from the shuttle. Anyway, the heat tiles of the shuttle deflect the atmospheric friction from destroying the ship just as the Deflector Array does in a similar fashion but for items that would be encountered in space, such as meteroids.

http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Deflector_dish


The navigational deflector (also called the deflector dish, the deflector array or the nav deflector) is a component of many starships, and is used to deflect space debris, asteroids, microscopic particles and other objects that might collide with the ship. At warp speed the deflector is virtually indispensable for most starships as even the most minute particle can cause serious damage to a ship when it is travelling at super-light velocities.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thermal_Protection_System

The space shuttle thermal protection system (TPS) is the barrier that protects the space shuttle during the searing 3000° F (1649° C) heat of atmospheric reentry. A secondary goal is protecting from the heat and cold of space while on orbit.


Aha....maybe that is what that Simpson's episode means, the one where the latch on the shuttle hatch breaks and Homer uses the "inanimate carbon rod" to fix it. I made a joke to Vince about that one day at work.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/STS-1
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STS-1 was the first test flight of what was, at the time, probably the most complex spacecraft ever built. Unsurprisingly, there were numerous problems – 'anomalies' in NASA parlance – on the flight, as many systems could not be adequately tested on the ground or independently. Some of the more serious or interesting were:

During reentry a protruding tile gap filler ducted hot gas into the right main landing gear well, which caused significant damage including buckling of the landing gear door[1]. Also, a tile next to the right-hand External Tank (ET) door on the underside of the shuttle was incorrectly installed, leading to excessive re-entry heating and melting of the part of the ET door latch.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Space_Homer
Orig. Airdate February 24, 1994

...

July 30, 2006


Thinking about STS-1, assuming I was there.

There was that traffic accident in my Ford Explorer pickup in 1986 in Terra Haute, Indiana. I was turning left and a car hit me square on my right wheel, remarkably causing no body damage and only flattened the tire. The impact twisted the truck around and I almost hit a light pole but I regained control and ended up on the sidewalk. An observer said she was speeding. I was traveling from Orlando to Great Lakes.

There was that time I was refurbising the manifold valves on that Blue Chevrolet. I put the carburetor, rather the timing mechanism is was attached to, I think, in wrong and it caught fire when I started the engine. Put the fire out with my hat. Afterwards, I chastised Micheal for running away but he explained that he had been running to the nearby creek to get some water to throw on it.

...

I was thinking again last night about that model rocket I wrote of a while back. It was that first multi-stage rocket I constructed and launched. The external stage didn't separate from the main body. I am wondering today if that is representative of STS-1 or of Stargazer/Pegasus in 1994. And why do I remember telling Scott Packnett to catch it before it hit the ground? Is that for continuity or does it mean something?

For a while now, I have been wanting to write about another memory I have from when I was a kid but never got around to it. I used to imagine a situation where I was falling through the sky and I was thinking about how I would survive the fall. In this memory of this train of thought, I was standing on the trunk of a tree as it was falling through the sky, on its way to hit the earth. How a tree trunk could be so far up in the sky, because it wasn't simply about a tree falling over as I was standing in the top which would make more sense, rather the tree was falling a long distance. So anyway, I imagined that if I waited until the very last second before impact and jumped off the tree trunk, I would gently land on the ground. In my memory, I remember eventually understanding that gravity doesn't work that way, that I was traveling with the same momentum of the tree and I would hit the ground just as hard if I was standing on the tree or not. I wonder why I have that memory.

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This reminds me of what I wrote about that flat tire on my Explorer pickup, but on the pickup, it was the right side.

http://www.jsc.nasa.gov/news/columbia/anomaly/STS1.pdf

Title: The left-hand outboard tire was cut during landing or towing to the Mate-Demate (MDM) facility. (ORB)

Summary: DISCUSSION: A 1 1/4" long x 3/8" wide x 11/32" deep cut was found on the left-hand outboard tire after the Orbiter was towed back to the MDM facility.

All STS-1 main gear tires will be returned to the vendor for inspection and test. Redesigned tires will be flown on STS-2. CONCLUSION: Tire cut was caused by lakebed debris. CORRECTIVE_ACTION: All main tires are to be replaced for STS-2. Runway is to be policed for rocks and debris.


I wonder if this was actually me they found a couple miles from the touchdown point:

Title: The right-hand main gear uplock roller split into several pieces and fell to the runway during gear deployment. (ORB)

Summary: DISCUSSION: The hardened uplock roller sleeve around the right main gear uplock roller split sometime during use and was found 1.54 miles prior to the touchdown point.


I just wish I could remember so I will know what all this means!!!!!

What the hell is a "uplock roller" for the landing gear? Is that what locks the gear into place after it retracts?

http://www.tms.org/pubs/journals/JOM/0402/Mayeaux-0402.html
...
The components exhibited varying degrees of thermal effects, and the M&P team was tasked to evaluate the significance of the damage and its possible relation to the breakup. These components included the midbody panel, uplock roller, main landing gear (MLG) strut, left wing carrier panel fasteners, and left wing tiles. A cross section of the orbiter’s left wing is shown in Figure 2.


http://www.tms.org/pubs/journals/JOM/0402/Mayeaux-0402.html

Figure 4. The uplock roller.

Main Landing Gear Door— Uplock Roller

The M&P team evaluated additional landing gear door and wheel well hardware believed to be relevant to the investigation. One of four left landing gear uplock rollers (Figure 4) was recovered


Something flashed in my mind as I looked at Figure 4, but I don't know what it is. After a few seconds, I remembered a high school teacher asking me if I knew what a turnbuckle was as we were decorating the gym for the prom when I was Junior Class President and in charge of the project.


Shit. Someone may have reproduced the damage on STS-1 to STS-107. The foam strike on takeoff may have just been a coincidence. I have been wondering about Challenger too and wondering if I was supposed to be on that flight.


I have thinking for a while about a time I was helping George Campbell with some auxilary component of the search radar on the Wainwright. We were in port and we both had to stay on the ship for duty and he asked me to help with it. We worked all night to replace some component that I don't remember. It had something to do with the cooling system of the radar. They guy who was doing the welding wasn't getting a good weld on it so we had to keep removing the component to him for a re-weld because the component kept leaking water. It was a very claustrophic job because we had to crawl into some very tight spaces under some machinery in some engineering space. I was reminded of it when I was watching some people diving off the coast of Florida. They had to wriggle and squirm their way through an entrance to a cave and it made me think of that time on the Wainwright. I remember my uniform was filthy from all the rust and dirt that had come off on it and I just threw it away instead of trying to get it clean.


So the landing gear went down at 75 feet:

Title: Radar altimeter data dropout at 75 feet. (ORB)
Summary: DISCUSSION: During landing gear deployment at an altitude of approximately 75 feet,


The shocks broke on that blue Chevrolet, I wrote about this a while back, and someone said they thought I was going to bounce off the road because the chassis was rolling up and down so bad when I hit bumps in the road.

Could this have happened because I wasn't onboard and they were still calculating with my weight onboard? Could my weight make such a difference of 3200 feet?

Title: Orbiter touchdown was about 3200 ft beyond planned point (ORB)

Summary: DISCUSSION: The Orbiter touched down 6053 ft past the threshold on EDW Runway 23. This touchdown point was about 3000 ft father down the runway
than premission planning had predicted even though the touchdown speed and approach trajectory were near nominal. Analysis based on the onboard trajectory data, ground based measurements of touchdown point, wind and atmospheric density from a balloon released 2 minutes after landing, and onboard speed brake position information indicated that the Orbiter lift-to-drag ratios were higher than expected both in and out of ground effects.


Maybe this is representative of what I wrote earlier about the left front wheel popping off my blue Chevrolet. I was thinking it represents an F-14 catapult accident, but maybe it has something to do with both. Who knows.

Title: Nose gear door thermal barrier fell off during landing gear deployment. (ORB)

Summary: DISCUSSION: The forward nose gear door thermal barrier was torn loose just before landing when the nose gear door was opened. This was observed on films of the landing and the thermal barrier was found on the lakebed approximately 1-1/2 miles before the touchdown point.

An inspection of this barrier and the adjacent tile surfaces revealed thermal damage on the left-hand side of the barrier at the location between the first and second tile from the edge. The thermal barrier (ten mil) inconel stiffener within the AB312 cover was burned through as was most of the thermal barrier. There were two factors leading to this failure - the alignment of adjacent tile joints and the stiffness of the thermal barrier which inhibited proper compliance of the thermal barrier with the irregularities of the tile surface. CONCLUSION: Poor thermal barrier installation was the cause of the problem.


That first time the left front wheel popped off, it was because I didn't tighten the lugnuts.


It feels like there is something rattling around in my mind that wants me to remember.....something about me falling off a moving vehicle. I can remember it happening to someone else, but I can't remember it happening to me yet.


This flight returned on a dry lake bed. Runway 23 is on Rogers lakebed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/STS-1
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edwards_AFB


Here is something that happened to the starboard landing gear, reminding me of that flat tire from the car that struck my Explorer pickup.

Title: Right-hand main landing gear door buckled.

Summary: DISCUSSION: A localized region of excessive gap heating occurred on the forward portion of the right main landing gear door. The excessive heating resulted in severe tile sidewall shrinkage (4 tiles), charred filler bar and a localized buckle in the door structure.

CONCLUSION: A forward facing step, a tile gap, a tile-to-filler bar gap and an inadequate flow restrictor resulted in excess heating of the main landing gear structural surface.


After they released me from the VA last year, I stumbled around in that senior citizens home, trying to find something to do, the very first magazine I picked up to read was a National Geographic edition from 1981 that described STS-1.


http://dilbert.tktv.net/Episodes1/

#5 Testing: Aired Monday, February 22, 1999

The "test engineer from hell" tries to destroy Dilbert's prototype. Dogbert gets a seat on the space shuttle.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_Shuttle_Columbia
...
In an episode of the animated Dilbert series, Dogbert is a passenger on the Columbia.


Maybe that is why they showed that motorcyclist on the news the other day. He was doing a stunt on a dirt track on a high ramp but it went wrong and he let go of the motorcycle and fell to the ground. I commented to myself that it was a long way to fall without a parachute.

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July 31, 2006

In "Generations," they filmed that orbital skydiving with Kirk but then cut it from the movie that was released. I am wondering if that was planned because of STS-1 in 1981. From what I've read, the shuttle crew discussed abandoning the shuttle but they did not do that obviously. Maybe that is why the orbital skydiving scene was filmed but not included with the release.

For the past several hours, I have been examining my memory for anything that could represent me falling out of the Columbia as it landed during STS-1, assuming that something such as that did occur to me.

There was that time in France where I walked off the wrong side of the train because I was drunk and didn't even realize I had fallen until I was face down in the dirt.

Another time, somewhere overseas, not sure where, maybe Le Havre, France, Mogge and I were returning to the Wainwright late one night. I was running along the top of some kind of concrete roof and then suddenly found I had run of the end of it. Even though I was very drunk, I hit the concrete hard enough to still register in my mind and I knew I was going to feel it the next day.

The first day of football practice in Ashdown after we moved down there and I was starting the 9th grade. School started in September I guess, but two-a-day summer practice started before the school year started. I was so out of shape that I couldn't get out of the bed the next morning for the second day of practice. Denzil was leaving that morning well before sunrise and he asked me I was going to practice. He was going to work at the gravel pit and Micheal was going to work with him as he was still on summer vacation. I didn't go into practice that day but did go back the third day and they worked me even harder for missing a day.

Then there was this time that I thought about a few hours ago and keep coming back to several times this morning. This was several years earlier than that Ashdown football practice day. We were still living in De Queen at Randy Romine's house. I think mom was looking for a place of her own, planning to leave Randy as she did several times. We were looking at some house I guess she was planning to rent. As we went through the house, I reached up and pulled on the cord to the stair-ladder that went into the attic. I look at something similar to that in this building and I start thinking about the landing gear cover on the space shuttle. I am wondering if that is the memory of me doing something to get the buckled cover off so that the gear can come down. That stair-ladder makes me think of a retracting landing gear. And, to add more weight to this theory, that next day in my memory, mom had to take me to the hospital because I pulled some muscles in my back when I reached up and pulled the ladder down. I am wondering if reality had me actually on the other side of that retractable structure and pushing it open, instead of in my memory where I pulled it down. And the part about me not being able to move from the couch represents that I fell through and hit the ground hard. I keep thinking about that video clip on the news the other day with the motorcyclist hitting the ground hard after his stunt went bad.

There is also that memory I have written about before where I climbed up on Randy Romine's 100 foot HAM radio antenna. One time I went up there with my first model rocket, the one that was fashioned as R2D2 from Star Wars. Then it dawned on me a few hours later: Of course! R2D2 is shaped a lot like the external fuel tank and the solid-rocket boosters for the space shuttle.

So then I started thinking that my real memories are locked into my symbolic memories of the same time. In other words, what happened to Kerry Burgess in 1981, for instance, has clues to what really happened to me in 1981. That isn't consistent though. But as I wrote earlier, I can usually find some kind of connection point to tie certain details together, the pattern doesn't always have to be consistent. For example, one thing can happen to Kerry Burgess in 1981 that represents something that really happened to me in 1981, but that date pattern doesn't always have to be consistent. Something could happen to Kerry Burgess in 1995, for instance, that happened to me in reality in 1983. But that 1995 and 1983 detail will have something else that connects them. So anyway, I started thinking about where Kerry Burgess lived in 1981. We were in a house on De Quincy street in De Queen. It was the last place we lived in before moving to start school in Ashdown sometime in the summer of 1981. Then I remembered reading about those problems they had on Columbia in April 1981 with the toilets and I remember a problem with the toilet in that house on De Quincy. There was another time I was lifting weights with barbells and one of the weights slipped off the slide and broke the window in my bedroom. We were living in that house I think when mom told us to watch the eruption of Mt. St. Helens on tv. I remember knocking out the lights when I tried to turn the house wiring into a tv antenna another time. Was it 4/15/80 or 4/15/81 when I remember that snow storm I wrote about yesterday? Maybe it was '81 because I realized that 4/15 would be the day after STS-1 returned. Not sure what the snow storm means? A ticker-tape parade? What about mom paying taxes? I remember that day our pet dog, a pekingnese named Susie, slipped out the door and I chased her around the block in the snow. I actually miss that little dog.

So then I started thinking: how fast is the shuttle moving when it lands?

Then I looked it up. According to this information on the atmospheric free flight, it landed at 213 mph. How the hell could I have survived falling something like 75 feet to the ground at over 200 mph?

If I did fall out, I must have been high enough to open my parachute. That is, if that even happened to me. It drives me crazy not knowing. I don't know what I don't know.

In "Generations," Kirk disappears from the Deflector room and then the movie jumps ahead, predictably now, 78 years into the future. When we see Kirk again, he is chopping wood. What could that mean to me? Assuming that I fell out of the shuttle as it landed, what does the scene with Kirk chopping wood represent?

Then I started thinking again about what I was writing, or maybe speaking out loud, about my experiences in 1985 with flying through DFW on my way home to Hicks Road. My luggage got lost every time I flew through there. Then I started thinking about that in terms of STS-1. I was luggage on that flight and I didn't make it back with the ship.

I started remembering this white Cadillac that Randy Romine drove. I am thinking that our white vehicles represent the space shuttle. I remember standing up through the sun roof one day as he was backing out of the driveway.

In the theme of falling out of the shuttle, there is that scene in "First Contact" where Data jumps down several stories to where Lilly is shooting at them.

And then I started thinking again about 4/11/91. I had that letter from Maria Coleman with that date. It is also the last day of Operation Desert Storm. It is also very close to the launch date of STS-1 ten years earlier, which was 4/12/81.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naming_the_Gulf_War

Operation Desert Storm was the US name of the airland conflict from January 17, 1991 through April 11, 1991.


I was thinking a little while ago about that Simpson's episode where Patrick Stewart does the voice-over as the leader of the Stonecutter's, or whatever they were called.

Assuming that I did fall out of the shuttle to the ground without a 'chute from 75 feet at over 200 mph, that would explain a lot. It would explain why I was looking for a bridge to jump off that I knew was high enough to be fatal. If I did survive that kind of fall out of the shuttle, then I would probably survive jumping off Aurora Bridge.

There's that scene in "Memphis Belle" where that one guy slips and almost falls out of the open bomb bay doors. There was that drama with the landing gear not going down and they had to manually lower it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memphis_Belle_%28film%29
Release date October 12, 1990