Ordinarily I wouldn't stop to make this note without a reference to past comments I made because to reference my past comments when I was still thinking at a time when recently under the influence of Seattle Veteran's Affair's hospital psychiatry drugs seems more credible.
I made only a cursory search for a reference in my massive blog archives for comments I am standing here now at my computer and not really even sure I made. I am standing here now confused about what the hell I started off searching for.
Oh, right. The photographs.
That inconvenient period in the first half of June 2005.
I was sleeping in my Jeep.
I was thinking again recently extensively about that period. I was thinking I would like to see that place again because I would like to see how much the trees have grown. That was timber country.
So for many times in the past decade I have regretted that time because I made a campfire and I burned my photos from the 1980s.
I had a lot of photos from the USS Taylor in a photo album and that time in June 2005 I made that campfire and I burned every single photograph I owned up that point.
What is more profound is the sense of profound in recent months about that activity of burning those photographs. In recent months I have had thoughts in my mind that by destroying those photographs I symbolically destroyed my memory of that extremely secret life I hypothesis I lived during the 1990s.
There is also this unbelievable sense of my mind about how pointless is all this. Describing this here is just so damn counterproductive.
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: posted by H.V.O.M at 9:58 AM Tuesday, December 12, 2006
I was thinking about that scene in the Oval Office where "President Thomas Whitmore" was standing there with one hand on his hip. I puzzled over that photograph I wrote about earlier where I was standing on my Navy ship because something about it made me think that was important. It was those thoughts that got me thinking I had been a fighter pilot in the Gulf War, although I had no actual memories of even getting within 5 feet of any kind of fighter aircraft. But the feeling progressed and it eventually led to that 5903 photo I wrote about, that is supposedly of Buzz Aldrin standing on the Moon with Apollo 11 when I believe that was actually me as a ten-year-old. I was a highly advanced ten-year-old and the primary reason I was part of Apollo was to prepare me for the 1976 mission to the outer solar system. I don't know how long that mission had been in planning but I would say it is safe to assume that it had been in planning since before 1965. They selected me because I was the best of both worlds, so to speak. My theory for a while has been that I was some kind of extreme child prodigy and by the age of 5 years old, I had the mental capacity of a 20 year old. Plus, by the age of 8 years, I could fly aircraft as well or better than people with decades of flight experience. What made me the best choice was that because I was still so young physically, I was more likely to recover from the severe physical impact of being in space and weightlessness for almost 2 years at one time. Another theory I have had is that after I made my first trip into the tempest of the comet to plant the first bomb and then transmitted the telemetry from that flight back to Earth, they put the other pilots in a recreation in a simulator but no one else was actually able to survive in the simulation and reach the comet surface. I have been thinking the past few days that I made that trip through the hurricane four times and that it took me about an hour each time. An hour of constantly avoiding near miss after near miss, some hitting me but managing to not get hit fatally. I am thinking that one of my shuttle/landers was destroyed at one point but I managed to get it back to the Project Orion craft. Maybe that is the source of what I was writing about a while in my journal about where it seemed familiar in "Mission To Mars" where they made an unplanned transfer from one spacecraft to another spacecraft while out in the middle of nowhere space.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 12 December 2006 excerpt ends]
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- posted by H.V.O.M - Kerry Wayne Burgess 9:30 PM Pacific Time Spokane Valley Washington USA Wednesday 02 March 2016
