JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2006 14:16:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Kerry Burgess"
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 3/6/06
To: "Kerry Burgess"
Kerry Burgess wrote:
I walked down to a lake, but the lake was fenced off. There was a chain link fence surrounding the lake and I could only look at it. The lake looked familar, Greason maybe, but I also recognized some CDA features. Some other stuff happened around the lake I can't quite remember. There were a few people there I didn't know, the people I think of as familiar strangers, they look like they know me but I don't know them. At another point in a dream, I am supposed to be moving out of some apartment, there were similar features to here but I was in a real apartment. A person who worked for the place I lived went into my apartment and then started talking to me out in the hallway. I can't remember all the details, but I remember he said something about it taking 15 minutes to move somebody in our something, I think he also asked where I was going to go, and I didn't have any idea. I remember also thinking about what I was going to do with all the furniture but I didn't know. The last of the dream I remember is in here, I was in my cubicle and Lynn walked by and told me to pack up, I guess she was taking me somewhere.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 6 March 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2006 14:16:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Kerry Burgess"
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 3/6/06
To: "Kerry Burgess"
Kerry Burgess wrote:
And of course they've tricked me into thinking I was getting out of here that day on many times before. One day a few months ago I had my bags all packed up and ready to get the hell out of here. I didn't know specifically what was going to happen, but I just knew today would be the day. It was not. Of course. It never is. Just another day of people fucking with my head. I guess they enjoy it.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 6 March 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2006 14:16:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Kerry Burgess"
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 3/6/06
To: "Kerry Burgess"
Kerry Burgess wrote:
Damn I just realized this is comparable to when I couldn't get my future ex-wife to leave my house. This is a lot like that, only about a trillion times worse. When was that? 91 or 92? It wasn't long after I got out of the navy. I remember how much I wanted to get a place of my own and have some privacy. And she just would not leave when I wanted her to leave. I even got to the point of trying to call the police but she kept unplugging the phone. One time later she sat on my car so I couldn't drive off. One time I tried carrying her outside but she was a lot stronger than she looked and it would have been impossible to carry her out without hurting her so I gave up trying. I remember tricking her into going outside, I threw a picture of her out into the woods and she went out after it. God I don't miss any of that. But this is a trillion times worse. Why can't I just get some peace and quiet for a while where I can relax and not have to worry about stuff like starving and what ever else I have to worry about? It's not that starving really worries me, it is just not being able to live a normal life that bothers me. It doesn't matter where I go, you all are there, trying to provoke me I guess. I don't know what the hell you people want from me.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 6 March 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2006 14:16:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Kerry Burgess"
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 3/6/06
To: "Kerry Burgess"
And then there was the time she broke into my apartment when I was sleeping. That was 91 I think, early on when we were dating. I was still living in Taylors, SC, nearby my job in Greenville. I remember I had been feeling very jumpy back then, I don't know why. I had a good job, I had a nice duplex apartment, it was a nice neighborhood. But I was worried about someone sneaking in while I was asleep. I had the doors rigged to make noise to wake me up. Apparantly she was able to pry the lock on the back door and I woke up with her standing next to me in my bed. The door trap had worked, but all it did was scare her, I didn't hear it because I had drank a lot of beers and passed out drunk.
It was actually after all these experiences that I decided on a better strategy to women. First, I was going to be a lot more selective about who I dated. Before I dated my future ex-wife I had been going out with someone that was a little quirky too, but she was only quirky in some good ways, she didn't break into my house or anything like that. I knew if I had asked her to leave, she would have. So secondly I decided if I am going to hook up with someone that turns out to be quirky, I am going to find someone that I can tolerate such quirkiness. But the real problem here, is even talking about this stuff, because the weirdos will use it, I don't quite know how to explain. If I say that it is ok for one person to break into my house, but that another person cannot break into my house, then a person that I really do not want in my house will then break into my house just to see if I really love her or something like that. It is lunacy. I don't even like thinking about that.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 6 March 2006 excerpt ends]
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/beyonceknowles/irreplaceable.html
BEYONCE KNOWLES
"Irreplaceable"
To the left
To the left
To the left
To the left
Mmmm to the left, to the left
Everything you own in the box to the left
In the closet, that's my stuff
Yes, if I bought it, baby, please don't touch (don't touch)
And keep talking that mess, thats fine
Could you walk and talk, at the same time?
And it's my name thats on that jag
So go move your bags, let me call you a cab
Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable?
So go ahead and get gone
Call up that chick, and see if shes home
Oops I bet you thought, that I didn't know
What did you think
I was putting you out for?
Because you was untrue
Rolling her around in the car that I bought you
Baby, drop them keys
Hurry up, before your taxi leaves
Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I will have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable (irreplaceable)?
So since I'm not your everything (irreplaceable)
How about I'll be nothing (nothing)? Nothing at all to you (nothing, nothing)
Baby I won't shed a tear for you (I won't shed a tear for you)
I won't lose a wink of sleep (a wink of sleep)
'Cause the truth of the matter is (truth is)
Replacing you is so easy
To the left, to the left.
To the left, to the left.
Mmmmm
To the left, to the left.
Everything you own in the box to the left
To the left, to the left.
Don't you ever for a second get to thinking
You're irreplaceable?
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'?
You must not know 'bout me (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute
You can pack all your bags we're finished (you must not know 'bout me)
'Cause you made your bed now lay in it (you must not know 'bout me)
I could have another you by tomorrow
Don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable?
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Date: Mon, 6 Mar 2006 14:16:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Kerry Burgess"
Subject: Re: Sleep journal 3/6/06
To: "Kerry Burgess"
Kerry Burgess wrote:
I walked down to a lake, but the lake was fenced off. There was a chain link fence surrounding the lake and I could only look at it. The lake looked familar
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 6 March 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: dated 2006
This photo reminds me of this one time in Great Lakes. I was in charge of a marching formation. I was approaching two officers that I guessed were in the Japanese Navy. But I was uncertain whether I was supposed to salute them. They had shoulder boards similar to ours, but they had that unusual circular loop not unlike the Brits. I am wondering if that memory is actually of me asking an enlisted Japanese Navy sailor if he saluted officers. I have a memory of something about that as well. Or maybe it was a senior Japanese Navy officer asking me, as an Ensign, if I saluted officers. In my memory, Captain Chandler was asking a female Ensign if Ensign's still saluted Captain's because she didn't salute him as they passed each other on the pier.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 2006 excerpt ends]
JOURNAL ARCHIVE: dated 2006
We were going to go scuba diving in De Queen lake and I asked him how deep we were going. And I remember thinking about, this seems weird, that the lake was deeper than that. What was the point, was something I remember thinking. These questions represent something much different, but I can't figure out what it is.
I'm the proudest homeless guy in this place. So I got that going for me.
[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 2006 excerpt ends]
