Friday, June 22, 2007

space shuttle flight STS-50

The space shuttle flight STS-50 seems to point to 7/2/1976. The flight STS-50 launched when I 33 years, 3 months, 3 weeks, 1 day. The mid-point of the flight was 7/2/1992. That was the 16th anniversary of 7/2/1976 so that means the launch was in the 15.9 years range after 7/2/1976. I guess the '50' is because of Hawaii. In my artificial and symbolic memory, my first assignment in the U.S. Navy fleet was the USS Taylor FFG-50 and I have described the symbolic connections there.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/STS-50



34.59 months after 5/13/1987. I recognize the date 5/13/1987 as when I returned from Africa after escaping as a Prisoner of War of the Libyans. I escaped when the prison I was being held at was bombed by the U.S. miltary and I noted the symbolic connections with that event as relevant to my real identity.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_Mutant_Ninja_Turtles_%28film%29

Release date(s) March 30, 1990

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is the 1990 live-action film based on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise. The film was followed by three sequels, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III and TMNT. This film presents the origin story of Splinter and the Turtles, the initial meeting between them, April O'Neil and Casey Jones, and their first confrontation with Shredder and his Foot Clan. The film's core plot closely follows that of the first published TMNT story, from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #1.

When the NYPD is unable to stop a severe crime wave caused by the Foot Clan, four new vigilantes, Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Raphael, will come forth to save the city. Under the leadership of Splinter and together with their new-found allies April O'Neil and Casey Jones, they will fight back and take the battle to Shredder.

The film kept very close to the dark feel of the original comics with only few elements making it in from the cartoon. The film received positive reviews, and it was a huge hit at the box office, and became the fifth highest grossing film worldwide of 1990.




This was one day from being a 59.3 months clue from 4/14/1986. That is within the day-of-week constraint. I recognize the date 4/14/1986 as when I escaped from the Libyans after the prison I was being held at as a Prisoner of War was bombed.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_Mutant_Ninja_Turtles_II:_The_Secret_of_the_Ooze

Release date(s) March 22, 1991

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze is a 1991 action / family film. It was the second Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film, being the sequel to the 1990 film, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The Secret of the Ooze was then followed by a third film in 1993. The film is commonly abbreviated to TMNT II.

The film follows the adventures of the four Turtles; Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael. Roughly resuming from the events of the last film, villain Shredder returns to take back command of the Foot Clan, and work towards getting revenge on the Turtles. When he learns the secret behind the Turtles' mutation, he becomes more dangerous than ever. The film sheds some light on the origins of Splinter and the Turtles, introduces two new villains; Tokka and Rahzar. Unlike the first film, this one rarely showed the use of their weapons. The Turtles instead fight bare-fisted for much of the film.

The film was released in March of 1991, and received mixed reviews from critics and fans. It departed from a lot of the darker feelings of the 1990 film, and in contrast was more light hearted than its predecessor. The film was still very popular, and it became the 13th highest grossing film worldwide in the year of its release



Paula Abdul was 13.59 years old on 1/21/1976. I recognize the date 1/21/1976 as when I first landed on the planet Mars. I assume this album marks Phoebe's birthday after I returned from Africa. I recognize the date 5/13/1987 as when I returned from Africa after being shot down by anti-aircraft fire on 2/14/1986. I also had thoughts suggesting I have some kind of business relationship with the American Idol television series.

From 7/16/1987 to 6/13/1988 is: 333 days

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forever_Your_Girl

Forever Your Girl is the debut album from singer Paula Abdul. It was released on June 13, 1988 and took 62 weeks from its release to hit #1 on the Billboard 200 album sales chart, the longest an album has been on the market before hitting #1. The album became multi-platinum in the spring and summer of 1989 and was eventually certified 7 times Platinum in the US (19.5 million worldwide). It also included four #1 Hot 100 singles - "Straight Up", "Forever Your Girl", "Cold Hearted", and "Opposites Attract." This ties for second most #1 songs from a single album. "The Way That You Love Me" reached #3 and "Knocked Out" reached #41.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paula_Abdul

Paula Julie Abdul (born June 19, 1962) is an American television personality, jewelry designer, multi-platinum Grammy-winning singer, and Emmy Award-winning choreographer.
In the 1980s, Abdul rose from being a cheerleader for the Los Angeles Lakers NBA basketball team to being a sought-after choreographer at the height of the music video era, then to being a Pop-R&B singer with a string of hits in the late 1980s and early 1990s. According to Abdul, she has sold over 53 million records to date.[1] After her initial period of success, she suffered a series of reverses in her professional and personal life, until she found renewed fame and success in the 2000s as a judge on the highly rated television series American Idol.

Abdul began dance lessons around the age of eight and showed a natural talent for it. She attended Van Nuys High School where she was on the cheerleading squad, and was an honors student. At 15, she received a scholarship to a dance camp near Palm Springs.

In film, Abdul choreographed the dance sequences in the films Coming to America, The Running Man and American Beauty, as well as Cuba Gooding Jr.'s touchdown celebration in Jerry Maguire, the giant keyboard sequence involving Tom Hanks’ character in Big, and The King's touchdown celebration, as seen in a string of popular Burger King television commercials that aired during the 2005-2006 NFL season.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Van_Nuys_High_School

Filming on the Van Nuys High School

The campus was used as a location for the 1982 movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Ridgemont High's mascot in the movie was the same as Van Nuys High School--a wolf, which remains VNHS' mascot today.



JOURNAL ARCHIVE: Re: Journal May 21, 2006, Supplemental

Damn, I thought after writing all these notes to myself today, this is going to turn in to the Great Lakes based on the volume. Every single detail I remember to my artificial life means something else, it is some metaphor for something else. All this stuff I see in the movies and television was put there to help me find my way back.

From my notes earlier today, I was commenting to myself that something is wrong or off with the timeline. That may be because I am older than I think I am, maybe several years. I can remember some clues over the past few years, of what I considered to be real memories and not implanted memories, that support this theory that I am older.

My current train of thought is that basically, I was in the military, possibly as a pilot along with some other roles, I was a POW at some point and was tortured during captivity. I suspect I was in captivity for a long time, but that sense of time may be from another experience. After escaping or being rescued or being released from captivity, I left the service and went to work for FedEx, possibly as a pilot. I was in a plane that crashed in the ocean and I washed up alone on a deserted island where I lived for 4 years before being rescued somehow. After I got back, had a hard time dealing with the fact that I had been declared dead and my world moved on without me. Maybe my memory was blanked because I was having a hard time dealing with it. Being a new person may have been a good opportunity to do some new kind of work for the government. I don't think it is a coincidence that my Navy assignment in my artificial life was as a Fire Controlman, compared with some of the addresses I remember living at over the years. Those are all symbolic I think of something I was working on. Something about preventing fires. Something about prevention. And something with the financial system and markets. They trained me well to gain attention to detail in the roles I was posing as.

Was I a musician? I can remember in that period following my return from the PG in 1988, I was writing code to produce some music I thought of as Classical.

My memory contains scenes from a time when I was on the Wainwright in the PG in 1988. We had a Marine detachment onboard and I remember being impressed that they carried 9mm's while we were still using 45's for shipboard security. I remember the Marines giving some kind of training or demonstration on rappelling down over the helo control tower to the helo deck. I am wondering if that is a similar metaphor to the ending of Vanilla Sky. In that movie, he created the need to jump off the building to demonstrate that it was all fiction. I am feeling that the rappeling memory demonstrates this process of bringing me back slowly. I was thinking there was something similar to that TNG episode where Picard has to kill the version of himself from the other time frame. I was wondering if that was what I would have to do, to kill myself. If this is not a real world, it wouldn't matter. But I'm not sure that is the process in this case. But who knows, it still has not ended.

It seems odd now, with all things considered, when a girl I went to high school with was emailing me a while back. I remember she sent me pictures of her kids. I was glad to keep in touch with her and I was hoping to see her next time I traveled back there. She and I went to the prom together when we were in the 11th grade. She's not the same person as the Tamara person I mentioned earlier. One time, sometime in the '90s, my grandmother told me I should marry this woman I took to the prom. I reminded grandma that she was already married and had three kids. I think this memory has some importance, other than the obvious. Could she instead be the Helen Hunt character of my Cast Away life? One possibility is that she was communicating with me to test whether I still had an emotional attachment to her, where pictures of her kids would exacerbate those feelings by reminding me that those could have been my kids. Or maybe she doesn't actually exist. Her name reminds me of that saying about the diamond. An anagram of her first name combined with her last name reminds me of a phrase about "bargain diamonds."

At some point today, I noted to myself the words: Inhibitor. Govenor. Throttle.

So much of this still seems unreal, but that is probably just a natural reaction to this kind of experience, of completely losing your identity. I think, though, that episode where TNG crew gets the memory erased offers some clues. I have retained all the skills I had before, but I don't find myself in an environment to demonstrate those skills. If indeed I did fly jets, I probably still have those skills. But I think also, there is an inhibition process in place to keep me away from those situations. And I find myself feeling something almost like dread coming over me when I even think about that.

When Picard returns to what he considers his real life, he starts over again by having to lose his heart. I wonder what the significance is of that? I don't think it is literal, in that I have a physical artifical heart, rather maybe I was heartbroken because I lost someone I cared about.

I was thinking about the character Daniels from ST:E. At first, it reminded me of the restaraunt of the same name in the Bellevue building we used to work in. I remember one day in 1999, a few of us from work were up there having dinner or something. One of my coworkers asked me what I liked to do in my spare time. I responded that I liked to drive around in my car and solve crimes. Not sure if I am Batman with amnesia, but I did fancy somewhat that my car looked like the Batmobile.

Can it be so bad???? Can whatever it is that "Q" put me here to understand really be that bad?

I was thinking today about that movie from a long time ago called Adventures of Remo Williams. The actor who played Capt. Janeway was in that one, can't remember her name. And by the way, why do we call women "actresses" anyway? They do the same job as actors, why the distinction?

Do I know all this, are they communicating all this to me because that is part of the plan. Or am I just too dumb to figure it out myself and they need to explain it to me? I've gotten the feeling that they have been blocking my reasoning powers at times, I guess so I won't figure something out, but I still just don't get something here. At what point do I become completely dependant on them to tell me what to do and think?

Back in the '80s, in my memory at least, I had this cool game for my Commodore computer. It was a space shuttle simulator, can't remember the name. It required a lot of planning and detail and was a lot more than just flying the shuttle. You had to manage money to buy parts and accessories to put into space, with the purpose being to conduct research. The EVA, which was used to construct a space station and to put satellites into orbit, looked very similar to the one from 2001: Space Odyssey. The neatest part was scheduling the shuttle flights and the respective equipment and crew. You had to pick scientists to send up to the station so they could conduct the research. I couldn't ever get the research projects started though. I find it notable, with all things now considered, that it was Mogge that told me one time about how he had managed to get the research started. I think there is a real person that I think of as Mogge, but the Mogge-character is not real. In the context of my memory, he was a peer of mine until I became supervisor. In my memory, he didn't take much initiative to fix the computers and was regarded as someone that handed tools to those of us doing the work. I wonder if in reality he is some kind of operating room technician or nurse-type of person and my memory of him handing us tools is actually of him handing instruments to doctors. It was Mogge, back in 2001 when I saw him in Charlotte, that told me I looked exactly the same as when we were on the Wainwright, except for the hair.

I was thinking of that movie Iron Eagle today. I read that it was released at the same time as Top Gun, which kind of surprised me. I thought the former came out earlier. As for Top Gun, I remember seeing it with my memory girlfriend Diane when I was going to school in Great Lakes. She was cold and I think I gave her my jacket. Sometime later, another Navy person was telling me he had been in San Diego, I think it was, where they filmed that bar scene and was telling me what was wrong with it.

And of course. Liz. In that episode where that probe forces Picard to live out the live of a person on that dead world, his wife has a serious resemblance to a woman I had a brief affair with back in the early '90s. I remember we were sitting on the couch eating pizza and her cat jumped up to get something and she sprayed the cat in the face with a bottle of water. Maybe there really was a Liz, I don't know.

I noted earlier that Simpson's episode about Ned being older than everyone realized. I was thinking too about how much older, or more properly, how much longer Data has been in service than those around him. There is something here I think, that connects to how Picard was much older in that final episode, but I'm not sure what it could be. I doubt I am going to find myself younger.

After my girlfriends father corrected me about the enlisted pilot error those years ago, I was then talking about how my dad told me that my uncle, James, had been with the "underground" during Vietnam. I remember that he retired some years ago and had been the manager of a club on some Air Force base. I heard that he had married a wealthy woman who owned a lingerie company.

In another memory from this artificial life, I remember telling my mother about how frustrated I was that my ex-wife, Tracie, could push my buttons so well to get me to do what she wanted.

Did I once date Paula Abdul? There's a memory I would sure like to regain!

There was a time, '91 I think, where a person with the initials M.C. told me she was worried about how much weight I had lost. I remember seeing this photo of me, although it was from a couple weeks after I returned from the PG in 1988, and I did look very skinny. I wonder if I had been in captivity during that time and had lost a lot of weight.

Is Rhinelander a town in Germany or a region of Germany?

Sheesh, where does this end? I could write for a thousand years about all this stuff and still not know what it means.