B-A-D.

You know the funny part? I probably haven't read this item in several years. And yet I still repeated it just a short while ago. Only after I wrote about that memory I went back a short while afterwards to look for references in my journal, which I thought was there. But I didn't recall precisely what I had written, especially how I could paraphrase almost precisely what I had written. I have just never considered myself to have a very good memory for reciting details. I don't know, maybe I did and now old age makes me feel less confident. I am writing about it now because simply I want to regain some kind of superpower I used to have and that is always available to me but that is not consciously accessible to me right now for some reason, as though I am deliberately ignoring it.

I just remembered I had another one of those sleeping dreams yesterday with the recurring theme of inoperative automobile brakes. In the sleeping dream yesterday, last time I was asleep, I was driving a schoolbus. There was a few passengers but they were vague. Some of the sleeping dream has faded from conscious awareness. What I still now recall was something as though I was feeling pleased with myself because I was going to perfectly park that schoolbus and I was feeling pleased about that and then I got to the point where I was going to park it and that was the point where I hit the brakes and the brakes didn't work. Not even the smallest amount would the brakes work. So I went backwards and forwards a few times and I was highly aggravated because the brakes wouldn't work and I would roll forward and then have to go backwards and I never could stop the bus where I wanted it to stop. Don't now recall if that was how the sleeping dream ended.

As I sit here now at my desk I have not driven an automobile for even 1 minute in the past 2937 days, give or take one day or slightly more. June 2005 was the last time I have driven a car so why would I have sleeping dreams now, over 8 years later, about driving a vehicle?

And as I wrote earlier today the reason I am writing about some of this stuff is that I hope feelings of nostalgia from the memories in my mind that I consider normal will help me sort of rewire the memories I have in my mind from the 1990s that are blocked by the security drug. As I said earlier, I have some memories of the 1990s but those are managed memories created by not consuming the security drug during certain periods of time and that was so that I would not have a completely blank memory of the 1990s and that is because if I had suddenly woken up with a blank memory then that would cause me to question my memory more, not to mention I would have had nothing to do.

So you see how I had details mixed up with facts.

I was secretly drugged. For a long time my official government role, among many others, was to pretend to be my biological brother Thomas Reagan. People who knew me in childhood from De Queen Arkansas could have met my biological brother Thomas Reagan in the 1990s and they would have completely believed that he was me, Kerry Burgess.

So he was in Africa in 1987. I was in Africa in Somalia in 1993.










JOURNAL ARCHIVE: July 31, 2006


In that 5th grade class in De Queen, Kendra Rogers sat behind me. One day she put a tack in my seat before I sat down. She was laughing later about how I "screamed." I protested that I didn't "scream," that I made some other kind of masculine response, that I can't remember now. I sure did like her. Lisa Card was in that class too, although I can't remember where she sat.


[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 31 July 2006 excerpt ends]





JOURNAL ARCHIVE: 04/07/07 5:33 PM
I have been thinking for a while about a journal I "remember" having in my youth as Kerry Burgess. I have been wondering if I actually had a journal with me as I crossed the African desert and that is the journal I "remember." I can "remember" Kendra Rogers yelling across a short distance to "Run, Kerry!" I think I was running for the bus.


[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 07 April 2007 excerpt ends]










http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/index.php?pid=38825

The American Presidency Project

Ronald Reagan

XL President of the United States: 1981 - 1989

Remarks to the Finalists in the Teacher in Space Project

June 26, 1985

The President. Class will come to order. [Laughter] Well, good afternoon, and welcome to the White House, if no one has said that to you yet.

First, let me congratulate you all. The fact that you've come this far in the selection process is testimony to your abilities and the respect of your colleagues. And I'm sure that you've made your schools and communities and your students very proud. I also want to tell you that your shuttle doesn't blast off for a while yet, so there's still time to back out. [Laughter]

I suppose that we all have a few special teachers that we remember with particular affection and gratitude. One such teacher for me was Esther Barton, back in Dixon, Illinois. I sometimes wonder what she would have made of our Teacher in Space Project. But I have a hunch, remembering some of my escapades, that if she were here today, she'd tell you this won't be the first time I've sent a teacher into orbit. [Laughter]










http://www.angelfire.com/movies/closedcaptioned/rightstuff-s.txt


THE RIGHT STUFF


I DON'T GET THIS--

SENDING US HERE
ON A BUS DISGUISED
AS CIVILIANS.

COME ON, GUS,
CUT IT OUT.

THIS OPERATION'S
SUPPOSED TO BE
HUSH-HUSH.

WE GOT
TOP-SECRET ORDERS

TO BLEND IN
WITH THE PATIENTS,

SO SHUT UP,
WILL YOU?

THERE MIGHT BE
RUSSIAN AGENTS HERE.

THEY DON'T LOOK
VERY RUSSIAN TO ME, GUS.

ALL WE GOT HERE
IS YOUR LOCAL GENTRY.

THEN YOU GOT YOUR NAVY
AND MARINE PILOTS OVER HERE.

GUS, NOBODY'S UP TO
AIR FORCE STANDARDS.

THEY GOT SOME 50-ODD GUYS
TRYING OUT FOR 7 SPOTS.

AFTER THEY PICK US THREE,
THERE'LL ONLY BE FOUR OPEN.

SOUNDS RIGHT.
WHERE DO WE GO?

GO IN THAT DOOR.

WHO ARE YOU?

MY NAME...

JOSE JIMENEZ.

YOU TALKING
TO US, BUDDY?

ALL AIR FORCE PILOTS
GO IN THAT DOOR.

WHEN THEY ALL GO IN,

THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME.

BUT WHEN THEY
ALL COME OUT,

THEY ALL LOOK DIFFERENT.

HOW'S THAT?

FELLA,
I SAID, HOW'S THAT?

WHEN THEY ALL COME OUT...

THEY ALL LOOK SCARED.










JOURNAL ARCHIVE: 11/3/2006 4:52 PM


The doctor who saw me at the VA


After the x-ray’s, he laughed and said that I was “full of shit.” The woman taking the x-ray’s was laughing too.


[JOURNAL ARCHIVE 03 November 2006 excerpt ends]










http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086197/trivia?tab=qt

IMDb


The Right Stuff (1983)

Quotes


Gonzalez: You know, Mr. Shepard, me and my friends think your Jose Jimenez imitation is A-OK. But what you're doing with it is B-A-D.





http://www.angelfire.com/movies/closedcaptioned/rightstuff-s.txt


THE RIGHT STUFF


PUSH THE BUTTON.
PUSH THE BUTTON.

LET'S GO,
LET'S GO!

COME ON,
COME ON, COME ON!

JESUS. HURRY UP.

OPEN. OPEN.

YOU KNOW, MR. SHEPARD,
ME AND MY FRIENDS

THINK YOUR JOSE JIMENEZ
IMITATION IS A-OK.

BUT WHAT YOU'RE
DOING WITH IT IS B-A-D.

OH, YOU'RE RIGHT!
OH, YOU'RE
ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!

OPEN!

TELL ME SOMETHING,
MR. GONZALES,

YOU EVER HAVE
ANY EXPLOSIONS
DOING THIS?

ALL THE TIME.
IT'S A MESS.

HMM.

TELL ME
SOMETHING ELSE,
MR. GONZALES.

HOW AM I DOING?

I THINK
YOU'LL MAKE IT.

I THINK YOU'RE GOING
TO BE AN ASTRONAUT.





http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086197/trivia?tab=qt

IMDb


The Right Stuff (1983)

Quotes


Gonzalez: All the time. It's a mess.

Alan Shepard: Tell me something else, Mr. Gonzalez. How am I doing?

Gonzalez: I think you're going to make it, man. I think you're going to be an astronaut.



- posted by H.V.O.M - Kerry Wayne Burgess 12:03 AM Pacific Time Seattle USA Sunday 30 June 2013